Vanessa Hudgens Tells Teenage Girls “Only Use Organic Sex Toys”

I knew Vanessa Hudgens was one of America's top role models, but her concert speech last night secured her place as a modern-day Mother Theresa: “And to all my short fans... Thank you for watching my sex tape. but let me be a role model now. When two sensual adults, pleasured me with produce, it was nutritional. Just because Jack Black put his ten-inch zucchini to my moist lips, and Bod Newhart licked broccoli puree off my quivering breasts, while I tickled his nut sack... And then they both sprayed cucumber yogurt all over my face. My message is, like all healthy American adults, we followed the New Food Pyramid.”